Monday, November 3, 2014

Voicemail

I wished that you answered but its OK, I'll leave this message. It may have been a few hours since we spoke that was a few hours too long and I'm longing. Just a gentle hello from you makes this storm of existence ease, I need that from you right now. My bow is breaking with only one solution; that strength in you.

Wednesday, October 8, 2014

textaship

Wake up, wondering if I got just One from you. From that moment I wonder If I mean a thing to you? And then it comes, so vague. Not sure how to behave but my feelings soaring like a raging wave and all I can muster up is "hey". A million times I've asked, "How are things present and past?". Same old predictable words while what I was to say occurs as: All day I think of you, no one else but you. If I could be so distracted from anything else? I would. Do you know your affect, just how much you interject? In thoughts I felt were absent of YOU, but yet you're present. Not sure how to assume or move because all of this we are not immune, but yet we talk and laugh as if when we reach our rooms it isn't each other we bay at the moon..for? What to do, where do we go, what do we say? How do we grow? Our hearts beat simultaneous to the beat of an irreplaceable tune that is specific to you, if you hear.

Hello Shadow

Hello Shadow, how have you been? Hello shadow, since I last saw you when? Composing the lines of the great Lena Hardaway yet her words so many years later rock me like a surprise every. single time.

Sunday, October 5, 2014

And Then

Sorry to wake you.
But did I shake you? Of all things to manifest...to go bump in the night it's my thoughts that rake you?

Saturday, September 27, 2014

I am (a challenge)

Me and my cousin were having an indept discussion on individuality and decided to challenge each other to an "I am" writing contest. My entry:

I am earnestly quite strange but I don't mind it.
I am a woman who struggles ambiguously with real life demons everyday and everyday.. I win.
I am kind, brokenhearted and observant of the menace that is society to our marginalized people; the ones that swim up-stream to escape a reality that they wish wasn't real.
I am useless. Because I fear the unknown like any other human. And because of my own wall of unpredictable behavior I stunt my growth therefore I stunt my purpose. Without effective purpose what else will you be?
I am a misfit. I don't like to be backed into a corner or told I can't do something so I will do just what you said cannot be done. Maybe I'm just stubborn.
Stubborn because I'm confident. Yes, the unknown is scary but when you are confident there is nothing "unknown" about what you are capable of. Regardless of what is said, it will be DONE.
I am a victim. The scars on my soul run deep and unanswered and I would be a fool to lie and say "I'm okay" when asked the arbitrary "How Are You?" on the eve of a day of loss.
So I guess I am a Liar. I bottle up the bad and foam out the good when it should be the opposite. But the bad always finds a long-term home.

Tuesday, April 15, 2014

I don't believe you

Trends or fads, which ever you feel, come and go but not without consequence. As does the notion of change and the fear that maybe we aren't ready to face it. The endless quotes and songs that guide our woes to and from that place of despair YET we always reroute to find ourselves just where we don't want to be. What is it about the culture of doom and gloom that is so popular and alluring to even the most Socratic of poets and musicians? Is the shadowy places that lure us in with pity so deep that we never actually leave them, just get eternally lost within them? Are the comforts of conformity comforting you comfortably? Or has the danger of possibility broken that fragile spirit of hope. None of us can stand here and pretend to have the answers to amend the cracked facades but through gentle support, we can all stay together.

Thursday, April 3, 2014

Earnest

Earnest conversation. I like that. When I dial a number that would hopefully be yours and can express everything on my mind and heart without reserve. I like that. Not worried about the receiving end of how and whys or why-nots and how comes. I like that. The conversation is just honest. The conversation just flows. Because my words feel safe with you. In their purest form. I like that. That, which can flow in ebbs and bows without skipping a single beat of mines or yours in our speech and emotional capacity. We don't have to worry about misinterpretation, we don't have to worry about rumors spreading, we don't have to worry about what each other thinks of this dance of ideas and manifestations of the soul because there is trust. Our nouns bounce off our lips and meet with verbs that form predication of a story meant for our discussion verbatim, and in action. Ad hominem when speaking of that which makes us afraid of our own voice but when speaking with you, fear has no place. And the only place for peace is between us. I like that.